“Advice for Aspiring Runners” and Long, Slow Distance Run

Firstly, I did my first deliberately slow run today as all the marathon training books seem to insist you run slow when you go long. One to two minutes slower than your goal marathon pace. Well, I couldn’t go to two minute out so I chose a target pace of 8:20. At the end of eight miles I was at 8:33 so pretty close.

Now that’s over with I can get onto the meat of today’s post. One of my friends (LeoV) is a professional race photographer and he posted his advice to runners on his Facebook page yesterday following a harrowing morning working at a finish line. It is hilarious and has some wise words, so I asked him if I could reproduce it here for you all to enjoy.

Take it away, Leo:

“To all you aspiring runners out there, some unsolicited advice:
1) Don’t be a dick. Many of you are dicks. Please, just stop being a dick.
2) If you stop ON THE START LINE to play with your iPod, with over 3,000 other runners surging behind you, you deserve to be trampled.
3) You don’t have to juggle while you run. It’s been done. Next.
4) Yes, it is important to finish strong. No, nobody is impressed with your finishing sprint into a crowded finish line. Earn your PR out on the course, not by endangering other runners at the finish line. You ran with the herd; finish with the herd.
5) Your personal finish line celebration is stupid, unimportant, and inconsiderate. Little Miss Cartwheel? You kicked someone in the head. Mr. Zoom Zoom, pretending to be an airplane. You cut off several runners and you tripped someone, whom you didn’t help up. Most unbecoming for a 50-something “man.” Yelling BOOM! while you stomp on the finish line. Yeah, we’re impressed with your 3:30 half, too. I walk faster than that.
6) Don’t pull your children on the course to run across the finish line with you. It’s unnecessary and dangerous. Share your “moment” with them off the course. No one wants to have to hurdle your spawn 20 yards from the finish.
7) If you’re going to vomit… Oh, never mind.

Many of you may think that all the time I spend around racing has made me cynical. The above observations were from just three hours, today. Can’t wait for next weekend! ”

Some very wise words there. Well, it made me smile. 🙂


3 thoughts on ““Advice for Aspiring Runners” and Long, Slow Distance Run

  1. Doggy's Style

    Number 5 always get me. I understand joy and happiness, but you can do it later on, not while blocking others.
    I would add those who throw the bottles as if they were the only person running and also those who start like crazy and push and elbow everybody and then 5 minutes later they are barfing.
    Very funny!


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